Monday, April 10, 2017

New Home for C

Spring Break has come and gone. By one week, almost two. Life was put on hold for a minute there. Our case worker went on vacation the week before spring break and I went on vacation the week of spring break and the foster family that is going to take over the care for C went on vacation and we all got back to 'real life' Saturday. Not a whole lot of time to make things happen. My hopes of C going to a someone else during that week were put on pause.

When I got back to life, Monday morning, I sent out a message explaining that I needed a plan. The 21st, when dad was supposed to have his apartment had come and gone. Spring break had come and gone. I was fine with a planful move, as they call it, but not ok with being put on the back burner. I put my deadline as Wednesday, so I could tell C the plan with the help of the counselor. Who we had an appointment with that afternoon. Got my answer back. C was for sure going to go to the same family who has her older sister (when I say older, I mean one year older) and I took the reigns from there. Made a plan with the new mom. Told the caseworker we would get it figured out and if there arose complications, we would let her know. It's so perfect. These workers just aren't as involved as I thought they would be. Which is just fine. I can make things happen on my own. In fairness, too, after our most rotten caseworker (who, by the way, ended up getting enough complaints against her that she resigned) we got a really great one. And because she's super great, she also have super complicated cases. A lot of kids with high needs and extra people in their lives - teams of people to help make their functioning the best possible. She came rather blindsided to our long story and has done her best to move things along but also recognized very quickly

Our date is the 15th. Decided last week, now that today is already the 10th. Kellie is working on the girls' room and has had to do some major room re-vamping. Moving a son downstairs out of his room to give C and her sister a space. And her own daughter and C's sister have been sharing a room, which was then revamped to accommodate the new shared room of C and the sister. It's been more bed moving than I care to think about. And not just twins, either. Bunk beds and doubles/queen - not sure which.

Which is fine. And then I get a message from Kellie, "I am painting." And I was just floored. All this preparation to go into adding C into their home. It's overwhelming. And I look at what I have to get done - what I have to get gathered up. And it's a little much. I have started a list, which will be easy to follow once I get started packing it all up. Right now my trouble is we're on the brink. Too soon to start filling the living room with boxes and bags, but late enough that I have got a detailed list of things that I am going to need to gather. I wish we had more space in this little 2 bedroom apartment. It is what it is.

I went over today to talk with Kellie about C's lactose-intolerance, her hair - those curls! - and other things like bed-time routine and phrases that we use at home that help her pull herself back together. I try to remind myself. We were given these kids with knowing nothing. And we've made it. We've done ok. And we didn't even have a number we could message with a quick question. Everything is going to be ok.

We have dance every Monday, 5-6, and I offered to pick C up from head start on Mondays. Have her come to our house for a nap and Alaska and her can play for awhile and I'll bring her home after dance. It works out super great. I will still get to be with her once in awhile, Alaska can have a nice play date, and then we can send C on her way.

Interesting - oh my gosh - fact. Apparently dad has an apartment. That much is truth. What they don't have is the $2,000 a month income to pay for it. Not even close. Not that rent is 2k - but that's what you have to make to move into the complex. And after a couple months they will be able to use their real income for a subsidized apartment. So. They're asking everyone and anyone for the green stuff. And even set up a go-fund-me account. Which is set at 4k. Because, as is explained in the piece, is not only to cover their stuff, but to help out with back rent on child support. Because I guess if you're doing it - may as well go all the way and get all things covered, right? It's sickening. Like the kind where you laugh because you have no other choice. So that's where we're at with that. Which makes it look like the girls won't be going to dad, even when school is out. He's got two weeks to get the money in, they've already been given a huge amount of time, and then they will give the apartment to someone else. Whooops.

Which I find a little irritating on my end. Because I have these huge les schwab bags full of C's stuff. The things that I don't dare get rid of, but because C is so unattached to material things, they hold no meaning for her and she hasn't missed them. I don't want to burden Kellie with them, I also don't want to be responsible for them. It's like literally holding onto baggage. I thought I could hold onto them for a couple more weeks while dad gets his stuff together. But a couple weeks looks like it's going to be a couple more months. Maybe never. And if he can't get his stuff together by June - then ummmm... do I dare hand it off to the next foster parent? Or maybe at that point I just give it all to him. But then I would feel bad if the girls ended up going to grandma and all of C's stuff is with dad. So really. I have no idea what to do with this stuff.


No comments:

Post a Comment