Wednesday, March 7, 2012

My Husband, The Terrorist

We headed out to Oregon the end of February to share Alaska's blessing day with all of our family out that way. 5 weeks old and she had her first airplane ride.

I carefully lay out all of our clothes on the bed before packing them away in the suitcase. When I got that 50 lb limit suitcase for graduation I never thought I would appreciate it so much. I can pack that thing up to 63 if I do a careful job so I generally just toss things in so that it doesn't exceed its limit because there's nothing much more embarrassing than having to open up your bag at the check-in counter, trying to shuffle 13 pounds around between different bags to make the big one an even 50 and then carrying 30 lbs in your small carry-on bag with your heavy coat on. Believe me.

In went a dozen of her outfits and a handful of t-shirts for me. Being a nursing mama makes it really easy to pack light since next to nothing fits. For the trip I went on a little shopping spree with my collected coupons and I gathered together a few shirts that didn't advertise my still flabby belly and my soft baby-holding arms. Unfortunately I had waited until the last minute to do her laundry, trying to gather up the very last thing that she got spit-up on and soak it long enough to guarantee it to come clean. Which wouldn't have been a big deal because I had plenty of time to dry them in the morning, except that when I woke up at 3 to feed Alaska the power went out from then until 7:10: We were being picked up in 50 minutes and I had other things to do at that point. So, also went into the cases three bags of wet baby things.

We got to the airport with lots of time, no stress. Generally I usually lug all of my stuff to the check-in counter because the person dropping me off needs just a few more minutes before the inevitable goodbye but this time around we were being dropped off at the curb and had a few less hands than would have been ideal. We were helped right away and our Ids were checked, our bags checked, Alaska checked and we all got our boarding passes while standing outside for just a few seconds. It was so easy and I was so grateful for the smoothness of it all. They didn't even weigh the bags, just threw them up on the dolly. Should have been doing it this way all through college to get a few extra pounds in those bags.

Going through security is always just a little stressful for me because there are so many people in a rush, jamming their belts and keys and wallets and shoes into bins to get scanned over. Your boarding pass gets marked up with a highlighter and then you're let loose into a fast game of survival of the fittest as everyone races to get past security. My favorite had always been when I went back to school for the fall and could wear flip-flops. It made checking through that much easier. But then, of course, in the winter I had to wear my heaviest boots and heaviest coat through all of that so that I didn't have to put unnecessary weight in my suitcase.

I had slip-ons ready to be put into a bin and was practiced at grabbing a couple at a time, dropping shoes and small things into one, backpack into the other. I have found its generally easier to use three bins if you have to rather than shoving everything into one, even if it fits. Getting through security is an art form of the practiced and if you have more than one bin, it gives you just 5 seconds extra between when the bin pops out with your shoes and small things, giving you just enough time to get organized before the next bin comes out with your jacket and carry-on. It's a fast process and those 5 seconds are vital.

This time was a little different as we fumbled to get Alaska out of her car seat but everything went smooth because I had already gotten some bins going of things that I had quickly whipped off before helping Steven get her out. All of my things and hers were scanned as we walked through first and Steven brought up the rear with the car seat and his backpack. I had my shoes on and everything back in my pockets and was starting to struggle with my belt while holding a baby when I realized that Steven was not beside me to take her for a second. No. He was stopped at the scanner and a security guard was pouring a FULL algene bottle of water into the trash. Steven had just filled it up as we left the house without me knowing. You can't take over a few ounces of liquid on your carry-on. Ooops. But that wasn't all of it. I fumbled with my belt and got it half-way through by the time the car seat came through with Steven's bag. Steven hadn't really used that backpack since college, two years ago and boys tend to just accumulate stuff instead of going through and throwing out. Which would be why one time when I was looking for our house key I found a few love notes I had written him and why when the bag was scanned under the camera they found a pocket knife that had been long forgotten. It had been discarded, but seriously. That's my husband. The local terrorist. Going to take the plane over by some water and a pocket knife. Which seems illogical, but with all the finicky rules you have to follow now-a-days most people check up on those before flying and here my handsome husband was, with two dangerous items in one carry-on bag.

The rest of the flight went on without any kind of disturbances and Alaska remained asleep the whole time. If she started to wiggle, even just turning her head, Steven had a formula bottle ready to give her to keep her asleep. I am pretty sure she gained 3 oz in just that 2 hour trip, but she stayed asleep.

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