The black hole; otherwise known as: the fridge

Check out the fancy punctuation on that title. Hu, pretty impressive hu? You gotta say it just right. The black hole, small pause, otherwise known as, longer pause, let the anticipation rise, the fridge.

And I am not even joking. Our fridge and its ability to capture innocent left-over food items is really that dramatic. I am pretty sure that if that thing were an animal it could not catch more food than we willingly feed it if it were faster than a cheetah. Although, it would have to go through some long droughts of zero food being passed through its gaping door and placed on the racks of teeth.

I loaded Steven up with some sorry looking vegetables, a few containers of yogurt, vienna sausages from a 'shopping while pregnant' episode, chicken, fruit and a few other things that were otherwise unidentifiable other than the fact that I knew the containers they were captured in had been sitting in our icebox much too long. The best thing about using empty yogurt and sour cream containers for left-over containers is if they are left too long it is much easier to toss the whole shebang than stink up our food disposal and risk the need for gas masks to avoid mold spores.

These are things that most people find in the fridge, buried in the deepest corners, often frozen as they are pushed further and further back nearer the vents. However, most people find these things after they have eaten what was fresh in their fridge and are getting to the nitty gritties of things that were not so delectable and were just scooched further and further back. Not so much in our case. Those containers were right up-front and center. In fact, we had more yuckies in our fridge than eatable items and therefore gave us the disillusion that our fridge was full. And this happens ALL of the time. Not just on occasions, all of the time. You can always count on finding some left overs that are being purposefully overlooked. And it's not that I don't know what's in the fridge, it's that I know exactly what is in the fridge and wake up in the middle of the night and can't go back to sleep thinking about the trapped contents that we will never consume. But are also just too disgusting to take care of and throw out.

We have two cereal bowls right now when our usual number is up around six. They are all in the fridge covered with plastic wrap housing bacteria science experiments. I know. It's disgusting. And I just can't bring myself to clean them out. So they sit there, because at least when they are in cooler temperatures than they don't give off any offensive smell.

And that is our fridge. We can't go shopping 'cause there's no room for anything but the occasional gallon of milk with all the rancid food taking up space. The only reason that doesn't go bad is 'cause it's got an easy-access cap and a handle to pull it out of the cold abyss. Our black hole needs to be emptied out and we need to fill it with some eatable things, but when everything over-does its stay its just not too encouraging to go and fill up on fresh vegetables and fruits and things that come with good intentions and sit in neglect. It's just not fair.

Our black hole is looking famished right now after the load I put into Steven's arms, but it is still a black hole and you know what they say about those things. They never go away, they just get stronger.