It's Getting a Teensy Tiny Bit Better Around Here

This week I would say was a decent one. C seems to have migrated to a hard day every 5 days or so and that feels nice. I took my break from teaching every single second of the day to just loving. And that 'just' has a lot of qualifications to back it up - but mostly that's what it was. Just.

Just loving when she ran after the cat. We took a minute to talk about how Kitty Kitty feels when he is chased.

Just loving when she colored on yet another book. We took a minute to talk about how that makes me feel when books are colored on. (This one is not slowing down. She is constantly coloring on stuff that shouldn't be colored on. Even with our rule of markers and pens staying at the table, if there is something on the table while they are coloring, it gets colored. Books, toys, the table, it happens all the time! And she is definitely not confusing books with coloring books. She knows the difference.)

Just loving when she hit Talmage. We took a minute to talk about how that makes Talmage feel.

Just loving when she screamed at me for I don't even remember what. We took a minute to talk about being respectful and how that makes people feel.

Lots of feelings go along with all that loving. But there weren't as many timeouts and what do you know - the cat chasing slowed to a minimum. This is all such common sense when you look at it after you have found the answer and you can think that I am dumb all you want. 'Cause even I feel dumb! But it's learning, none-the-less.

The one thing I did not put up with was the whining. It has gotten out of hand around here. And the forgetting to use manners. It boils me over. So we practiced asking and when they forget I say 'try again' and they are supposed to try again in asking. At first I was sending them to their room when they forgot but I quickly learned that didn't help. Instead it was just a stand-off. So I started setting the timer for 4 minutes, what is usually a timeout length of time around here, and then they can try asking again in 4 minutes. That went over much more well and didn't drive me nearly as crazy because I didn't have to have a battle of defiance every time. We're still practicing and sometimes I forget to follow through - but I hope we get there. That was the hardest day. The day where I was trying to teach that and follow through really well with the consequences for not asking in a regular voice and leaving out the request words. Mostly it's a whine of "I need milk" instead of something nice like, "Could you please get me some milk?"

We had three really good days in a row. Like, not just a regular mediocre day, but a really good day. Like we were a family day. And C has started saying, "Jessica, I love you." through out the day and that makes me feel better about life.